1) I now know how it feels like to be in an ambulance. Like a roller-coaster ride. Seriously. That Friday morning I accompanied my mother to Serdang Hospital in a Pusat Kesihatan Seri Putra ambulance. The journey was bumpy but speedy. My mother kept on asking what this and that was showing the lights and the window. I told her we were going to see the doctor because she was having a fever. She kept on holding my hand to her chest and closed her eyes. Once in a while, she would reach out to my face, feel my forehead and ask me if I am already OK. She thought I was the one with fever.
The one we took back was better. It was a private ambulance. And we were not in a hurry anyway. I took two ambulances last week!
2) I accompanied my mother throughout her "ordeal" at the yellow zone from the time she arrived till about 9.30pm. The yellow zone only allows one person at any time. Since it is not a ward, there is also no where to sit. Imagine having to stand for almost the whole day... When I couldn't stand anymore, I would go out to sit at the green zone (non-critical zone). That day was also the first day ever in my life that I break fast alone. Literally alone. Everyone has gone back by 5pm. My Kak Lang will only come after Isyak. At 7.20pm, I went to the mart at the lobby to buy drinks. The cafe serves food but I felt nauseous just smelling the food. Half way back to the emergency area I thought, I might as well break fast at the lobby and then go straight to the surau. I then went back. It was 7.30pm by then. The lobby was almost deserted and dark. There were only around 4 people there. I sat on an empty bench and took two sips of drink. It was the loneliest break fast ever in my life.
I straight away went to the surau before my tears started to pour. There were 3 people there. As I took a sejadah, a kakak about to perform her prayers turned to me and asked, "Nak jemaah?". "Err... akak imam?". I asked. She nodded and smiled. I quickly got ready and prayed with her. My eyes were brimming with tears. I might not break fast with hearty food as always but Allah replaced it with something better. A rezeki to perform solat jemaah offered by a stranger.
3) My mother was discharged at our own risk. I signed the papers. She was too stressed out. We worry she might get some other illnesses if she stayed. For the past few days, she doesn't chat as always. I don't call it senile as she still recognise people but she kept on calling our names asking to come back. She also doesn't eat and drink much. When ever I see her, I would force her threatening sending her to the hospital if she doesn't. And she would eat a few bites. It's a pain to watch. Last night, I carried her to the toilet and cleaned her up. She made my effort to carry her difficult by hanging on to the drapes and the mattress. As I was leaving, I looked back at her. I saw her looking back at me. I cheerfully told her to eat and drink. That I would come back tomorrow. She smiled, nodded and closed her eyes. I drove back home in tears.
The one we took back was better. It was a private ambulance. And we were not in a hurry anyway. I took two ambulances last week!
2) I accompanied my mother throughout her "ordeal" at the yellow zone from the time she arrived till about 9.30pm. The yellow zone only allows one person at any time. Since it is not a ward, there is also no where to sit. Imagine having to stand for almost the whole day... When I couldn't stand anymore, I would go out to sit at the green zone (non-critical zone). That day was also the first day ever in my life that I break fast alone. Literally alone. Everyone has gone back by 5pm. My Kak Lang will only come after Isyak. At 7.20pm, I went to the mart at the lobby to buy drinks. The cafe serves food but I felt nauseous just smelling the food. Half way back to the emergency area I thought, I might as well break fast at the lobby and then go straight to the surau. I then went back. It was 7.30pm by then. The lobby was almost deserted and dark. There were only around 4 people there. I sat on an empty bench and took two sips of drink. It was the loneliest break fast ever in my life.
I straight away went to the surau before my tears started to pour. There were 3 people there. As I took a sejadah, a kakak about to perform her prayers turned to me and asked, "Nak jemaah?". "Err... akak imam?". I asked. She nodded and smiled. I quickly got ready and prayed with her. My eyes were brimming with tears. I might not break fast with hearty food as always but Allah replaced it with something better. A rezeki to perform solat jemaah offered by a stranger.
3) My mother was discharged at our own risk. I signed the papers. She was too stressed out. We worry she might get some other illnesses if she stayed. For the past few days, she doesn't chat as always. I don't call it senile as she still recognise people but she kept on calling our names asking to come back. She also doesn't eat and drink much. When ever I see her, I would force her threatening sending her to the hospital if she doesn't. And she would eat a few bites. It's a pain to watch. Last night, I carried her to the toilet and cleaned her up. She made my effort to carry her difficult by hanging on to the drapes and the mattress. As I was leaving, I looked back at her. I saw her looking back at me. I cheerfully told her to eat and drink. That I would come back tomorrow. She smiled, nodded and closed her eyes. I drove back home in tears.
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