Living with Sarah

Today in history - we conducted our very first training at this new office. It's Hubby's topic today. We actually received only 3 participants. But enough for the training to go on. If buat kat hotel, memang I cancel. Tak balik modal langsung. Our 2 staff joined as well. Akak? Even though the topic is very interesting - web risk management - I can't afford to sit the whole day for the class. I got this sebutharga to finish up to submit early next week. So far no fumbles. Food abundance and cheap - from gerai Pakcik Nasi Lemak downstairs. Having conducted lots of trainings at hotels previously, we have learned quite a lot. So, everything that needs to be there - is there. Everybody is downstairs having lunch at Sham Sup Utara. Free flow of coffee and tea. Took this idea from MPC - sediakan air panas and mugs. Anytime wanna drink can always go to the back and prepare sendiri 3-in 1 coffee or tea. Very cost-saving - tak payah buat 2-3 jenis air utk different tekak.

I just came back from a day trip to Kuantan. For a sebutharga briefing. I went alone. And drove 8 hours to and fro in our little Viva. My right knee is killing me. So is my back. It's been quite some time since my last visit to Kuantan so the trip really was tiring. The Latio would have taken less time and offer much more comfort for my back and bum. At one point I actually thought - wish I had the Latio now! I spent the hours talking to myself, singing my off-beat tunes and most of the time thinking and reflecting. There's so much stuff to think about. Most importantly - what I should do for this situation I'm currently facing. In the end, I still couldn't find the answer. And I still don't know what to do. The songs I listened to didn't help much. The whole point of listening to the bunch of them is to get that feelings back. But they just gave me sore throat. I don't know whether this is a sign. That perhaps it really is over? I stopped at Temerloh and ha...

I wish to stop swimming. I am so very tired. For the past few days, it felt like being abandoned. All these that I've worked on have come to this point because I had the support. But like I always say, other people can just stop and let go. This pond we are swimming in - anyone can just hop out and leave me swimming alone. Maybe I need a break from this tiring swim. Just for a while... Maybe not. I'm not the person to abandon anything or anybody.

This morning we clocked almost 32kms - from our place to the Semenyih route, Bukit Mahkota, Nilai 3 up to that big crossroad at Nilai Impian and then came back. Tiring but felt really good. Now the bodyache has started to crept in.

My cycling routine is going quite well despite not being able to cycle to work for the past 2 weeks. Aliyah suddenly started her "mood swings". She doesn't want to stay with my Kak Lang after school, she wants to go to our office. So, we have to fetch her from school, meaning I have to drive to work while Hubby cycle. She has also been skipping school Mondays and Tuesdays - the days that she knows she has to stay with my sister - feigning sickness. Not very unusual actually. Aliyah has this "unknown reason for laziness" every year. So, we normally but just let her be. She will get over it sooner or later. The first week we cycled, to and fro the office is about 8.8kms. It was so tiring we had to stop at 2 places. Now? We just came back from cycling around our usual route - the road heading Semenyih and back to my parents' place - about 10+kms and felt nothing :). The cycle up the hills is always tiring, and feels like breath is being knocked out of me, but a...

Alhamdulillah... this test we are currently facing has seen a little light. This client yang selalunya agak lambat bayar suddenly said our cheque is ready. At least this payment will get us going. Must not give up, especially in praying, wishing, hoping, even dreaming... With hard work, of course. This dream of that product inspired by Aliyah Maisarah is progressing well. My team has started groundwork. And we have found the perfect partner to work with. It might see the light of day earlier than expected. Perhaps 6 months earlier than planned. Don't stop dreaming, working, praying, hoping... No matter how difficult things might be. At times I do feel ashamed that once or twice I actually did give up. I thought, oh, what's the point of asking anymore if what I asked for is not granted, if all the energy I have has been channeled but yielded no results. But then I thought again - if I don't ask, hope and pray, that is even more shameful. And arrogant. Continue dreaming, work...

Sometimes, things do not go well at all. Many, many times I wonder what goes wrong. Have I not been good enough, asked enough, worked enough, be nice enough...? As humans, obviously nothing is ever enough. But asking for more than I could give is really shameful. No, it's not arrogance. It's plain shameful. How can I ask for more when there are people out there with no food? How can I ask for more when there are people out there living in the streets? I have food and shelter. I should be thankful. But I ask in shame - please, give me a little bit more than what I have because I have need for it. And now, of all times, the need is great. My good friend Yatt told me to ask and continue asking. Pray and ask, she said, the problem is we don't ask enough. I know it's true. I do pray and ask and hope and beg. I know it's a test. This whole thing is a huge test. This morning I watched the fishes swimming in our little pond, my left chest felt burning, my breath felt short....

Ever since I introduced her to Junior Masterchef Australia, Aliyah has been a fan. She would say, "Sedapppnyaaa..." watching the kids cook. Memang nampak sangat delicious pun. A few weeks ago, we bought her a resin-coated knife, that looks like the ones being used in the show. However, even though it looks plasticky, the blade is still stainless steel and so very sharp. Aliyah has been so excited to help out in the kitchen ever since. I don't think my mother had a hard time letting me help out in the kitchen with a knife when I was little. I believe I was dragged into helping! But Aliyah... letting her hold the sharp knife... cutting something... I cringe even at the thought. I know I have to let her try. She's a girl after all. So, since yesterday, she's been helping out - peeling and cutting the onions and garlic, and cutting up veges. I let her use the knife but kept one saying - "be careful with your fingers..." like every 5 minutes. She's been e...

Now that our cycling regime has entered the 2nd week, we have started cycling out of our usual office route. For the past 2 days, we have cycled about 10+kms to the Bangi-Semenyih route - at the highway like road before turning to Batu 6 and back to Pekan Bangi. The challenge is to cycle up the hill - every time pandang depan tengok tak lepas bukit lagi memang rasa nak menyumpah. But just like any other exercises - the satisfaction is at the end of the route. When sweat drips from your forehead, when your back and legs ache, and when you gulp down gallons of water, you know you have conquered a challenge. This morning, it felt so good to feel the cool morning breeze on my face as we raced down the hill. Tapi, punyalah penat menghabiskan calories, tambah more calories dengan stop dan makan lontong kat kedai Kak Ruby! Next, we plan to add more kms by turning to Bukit Mahkota and then back to our place. Should be able to add maybe another 7kms. Slowly and steadily. After our morning cycle...

The whole of Bandar Seri Putra is currently in a mess. Most of the roads are being resurfaced. Heavy machineries are everywhere. The contractor doing the work are not managing the traffic well. Some roads are being scratched out that they are really rough, I can almost hear my car screaming. Some roads are just being resurfaced that the tar is still hot. While some are somewhere in the middle with pebbles all over the roads. Yesterday afternoon, I was driving back home with Aliyah, with my head full of all kinds of problems. At the first the road was really rough and course, then right after a corner the stretch seemed to have been resurfaced - very smooth. And the rest of the drive was a good experience. Perhaps this course I'm taking is like that... things now are really difficult. There are obstacles and challenges and many many times I thought whether I can survive this. Every day is like a crawl. No matter how hard we work, things don't seem to move. I hope life will be li...

Our first little family cycling time outside our neighbourhood - from our place to my parents' place. Not so far - only 2.6km away. So, pegi balik 5.2km. Aliyah put on her roller-blade helmet and her old princess specs (because she saw me wearing specs - I said didn't want dust or sand to get into my eyes). So we cycled. The road after the bridge mid-way is quite narrow with lots of cars and that got me really worried. But Aliyah was ok and followed our instructions. When we got there Aliyah was surprised - "tak penat pun!". Ye la, the route was basically flat unlike the route to our office. She seemed to enjoy the ride and agreed to make cycling our weekly activity. And she's been eyeing my helmet. Will try to get her a proper one. On the way back at Bangi Villa. Stop jap amik gambar...

I received quite a lot of responses and likes for my FB post on me and Hubby cycling to work. I can't say I'm good at it because we have just started this week. So far so good. Weight wise - not much improvement yet. Stamina wise - also not much improvement yet. Body wise - also not much improvement but Hubby did say there's this certain part of my body that has become lots more firmer. (Hehehe...) I was inspired by the story that appeared in The Star some time ago featuring my ex-university mate who cycles to work from Klang to PJ. I have thought of cycling to work ever since our old office days. But the 2 routes to the office are really not suitable for cycling - a) the "jalan dalam" through UKM where the roads are narrow with many cars and lorries; and b) the Seremban highway. So when we moved to Bandar Seri Putra that was one of the first things that we planned. And selling the Latio was the first step. Nowadays, we enjoy cycling so much that we don't have...